The Sport of Luddites
Self-explanatory. Logic dictates that this means "don't harm the hotel" or the presenters get hurt too.
Radio controls could breach the first part of this law if you share signals with someone else. We want invention and quirkyness. Programming or clockwork is something to think of. A previous "Personality" winner "K-Nexx"was cam-controlled. An example to us all. A robot must also have it broken to it that the Umpire/Tek Crew's decision is final.
All together now: "Bollocks!". We're here to see things fall apart, go stupidly wrong, and, in short, express some personality in its brief little life. We don't want a gridlock of tanks. We want The Goon Show expressed as cybernetics.
The point of these rules is to get robots to take part in BC
rather than to prevent them. If you aren't sure about
anything, just ask us. We'll try to get your robot in
somehow.
No robot shall be greater than three feet in diameter without a very good reason.
Children and pets shall not be considered to be robots, nor shall their cerebral cortexes form an integral part of a competing robot's programming. This goes double for pigeons on the pitch.
Any fish killed by a robot will result in the dousing of the Umpires or the Cychotic of the offending Robot.
A Cychotic may carry out repairs or adjustments to their robot after the match has started if the robot is deemed to have far more to offer than it has been allowed. This must be an Appeal decision (If it appeals to the Spectators and Umpire) See 'Rule Of Thumb'.
Negative points will be awarded for Imaginary robots. Such negative points will be awarded to any robot the penalised Cychotic may introduce at a later date. In the event of a tie, this may be crucial.
Bimblebots may be considered a hazard, rather than a contestant, as they're too boring and difficult to kill. Hazards are welcome.
Whilst gambling on robots is to be encouraged, if anyone sets up a bookies, the organisers would be grateful if some of the profit were donated to the Feryal Raja Educational Trust (Check with organisers or us for details). Skipping is deemed a skill to be practised only by the Sprokkettes upon the pitch.
All robots get stage fright. Whilst your robot may well perform perfectly for months, up until five minutes before the match, it will very probably stop working just as soon as it is introduced. It will then work perfectly just as soon as the match is over. This is not a law in the legal sense, it's a law of physics. And you cannae change the laws o' physics.
More a subroutine than a law. See below.
Unlike listening to an intelligent, well planned and technical panel item, BC requires its audience to actively participate. This doesn't go well with sobriety or a hangover. Having had a sober audience once for BC (BCIV), we know what we're talking about. BC is an event for drunks - or for children (Which, let's face it, is a state of mind that drunks are trying to achieve). BC must never, ever be programmed so early that the audience doesn't have a chance to a) recover from the night before and have a decent fried breakfast and b) get moderately tanked for the event. Programmers please note.
The correct size in feet for a Beyond Cyberdrome Pitch is "In The Area: 25/25" (That's measured in feet. Not inches).
We strongly encourage people to take photo's, video DVD, whatever, BC just so long as they give us a copy, to make even more available to a larger public. In return we'll give them a copy of the "Even more available to the general public". We're dead serious about this one. Everyone wins. Yes, we're happy to credit you. Photo's are handy for the Website and any little piece of video can add to the final edit that's shown to future generations of Dead Dog Parties.
Any person losing points by virtue of
transgressing the 1997 Virtual Penalty Law may 'buy
back' those points by helping someone else make a robot.
Any Royal Personage may render an otherwise mundane Easter Egg to be a temporary V.C and M.B.E. during the Awards Ceremony by virtue of a remarkable Parahaemic quality. It's beyond us.
Sprokkettes may perform complex Binary Dance Routines upon the pitch between actual matches without punative action. They may be distinguished from the Audience by their highly specialised clothing. This may look like a mere pedantic restatement of part of the 1998 Gambling and Skipping Limitation, allowing us to mention Sprokkette clothing again, but we know better.
If there's a monolith to be transported by BC personnel, it's to be left until BC has been sorted. This may not be an eventuality that's very likely to be repeated, but it's as well to be prepared. Anything can be deemed to be a 'Monolith' if it involves more than one person to deal with it.
When awarded the VC, or Subtitute VC (If some git's not returned the VC from last year) the Awardee is receiving a sacred charge to return the VC the next year to be re-awarded and will move Heaven and Earth to do so. If they don't, they owe everyone who attends B.C. a beer (That's a HECK of a lot of beer, so take this seriously if you ever want to attend an Eastercon again!).
Every year we mean to say "All praise be to Tek!" and lead the audience in a rousing chorus of approval and applause for the people who make B.C. possible. Every year we're so damn busy with presenting and running the thing as it rolls hecticly to a climax and we shout "That's it! Same time next year!"... and we forget until we look up to see the face(s) of the people who've been monitoring the sound levels etc. We're obviously rubbish at it, so, from now on, we ask the audience to give the cheers independently and remind us. Ta. See 'Groundsman's Notes'.
We know that in writing an article about 'BC', you want something quick, punchy and easy to remember, so 'B.C., by Sms' is eminently suitable (And does Sms' ego no end of good). On the other hand, it must be admitted that whilst Sms does act as the lynchpin of BC, the thing's pretty complex and really does take rather a lot of people to make it happen. We're not suggesting anyone writing a newsletter should waste time researching all the other people who have put time into BC, just that anyone reading said newsletter should bear in mind that this is just a handy summary by busy people. (Guess who writes this stuff then).
Anyone thinking of holding an Eastercon should contact us Asap to affirm the basic requirements so everyone knows what they're doing. This is best done via talking to us in person over beers you've bought us, but taking a look at the 'Groundsman's Notes' page on the BC Website and dropping us an Epost will run a close second.
From 2002, we have limited time to pull BC together during the Eastercon itself. We're babysitting. Best to organise as much with us in advance. We're likely to be in the creche. Ta.
So, Please build us lots of robots. Bring the old one's along too. Give us your tyred, your poorly built, your humming masses...
This is what you are all competing for... There are two main
prizes:
The overall winner; sometimes democratically voted by The Rule of Thumb and
The most inventive or amusing. Very much open to The Rule of Thumb.
Could last years winners PLEASE remember to bring their trophies along to we can pass them on (Or re-award them). Ta.
There's also stuff like:
The Most Unpleasant. A dyslexic award invented (In the form of an Easter Egg)in BCVI: 'By Royal Appointment' by Iron Feetus and awarded by HRH (Ex-RIP) Queen Victoria. And:
("In honour of the Best That Is British
Engineering"). A 'Crackerjack' style award.
Given to children only… so far. Perhaps we should
state here that we do try to award prizes to child entries.
Though we don't always manage it (We have to
find/buy/bring the damn things), children are equally as
likely to win the VC or MBE as anyone else. But… so
what?
A Foot-High figurine of the forefront exponent of Yorkshire Engineering Genius, lovingly crafted in petrolium-based mock-rock. (Presented at BCVII: CBC.)
Brilliant!
We're delighted that people have realised that B.C. is NOT
bloody "Robot Wars" (Possibly because
B.C. started two years earlier). This is important for three
BIG reasons: 
If you could give us a written account of your Robot, your Name etc. at the Robot Workshop the audience will be very grateful. After that, please leave it with us at the Voodoo Board.
Any robots we only find out about at the event are more than welcome but we may fail to give them the buildup they deserve.
As soon as we're sorted enough, we'll have an 'entrants sheet' loaded onto this for you to just do this over the Net, but until we've built in the Ontology Buffers to protect us from 'Viurtual Robots', we're still having to depend on The Real World.
Just turn up at the Workshop and ask for a form.
Thanks.
